Family Worship in the Home

How should I do Family Worship? 

Here are some various points about how to practice proper family worship, from the first day of the week, through the seventh day of the week. 

First, you and your wife should plan the days which you can separate for private worship. Here, my recommendation is the following: Do not do family worship after dinner time. Many children get sleepy, as well as some adults. However, if it works for your family, you might ignore this recommendation.

Second, you may choose a book of the Bible from which you and your family will be reading chapter by chapter. My recommendation is to start from the very beginning of the Bible: so your family would have a good lesson of the complete Biblical overview.

“As the charge and office of interpreting the holy scriptures is a part of the ministerial calling, which none (however otherwise qualified) should take upon him in any place, but he that is duly called thereunto by God and his kirk; so in every family where there is any that can read, the holy scriptures should be read ordinarily to the family; and it is commendable, that thereafter they confer, and by way of conference make some good use of what hath been read and heard” (The Directory for Family Worship: Section III).

Third, the singing of the Psalms should be regular practice. Nowadays, we utilize the Psaltery and its tunes. Personally, I recommend the 1650’s Scottish Psaltery, since it was approved by the Westminster assembly. Choose at least three Psalms. As an alternative, you can have a Psalms Singing and Prayer Night. This may be a substitute when, for any reason, one can’t guide his family as its head (here the reader may judge).

Next, the passage’s explanation is a must. We have thousands of resources: the Reformed Heritage Study Bible, The Directory for Family Worship, and various commentaries to study, for example. We can at least read these commentaries and ask questions to our family. There is no need to have a high-ranking expositor in our home’s living room. Instead, we need a father who applies these truths to his family.

Finally, pray and bless your family in the name of our Triune God. Here we can pray for the needs of our wife and kids.

We should see family worship as the most common and natural thing for Christian families,  not as a heavy burden. Avoid extremism, or thinking that by doing a long session of family worship, we can gain something of God’s favor. Please remember that all our offerings should be voluntary and with a humble and grateful heart. 

Family worship should start like this: Praising the name of God in Jesus Christ, singing their Inspired Hymnal, reading His word, and closing with His blessing. As simple and common as private devotion should be.

Finally, here is a final exhortation to the Elders of the Reformed congregations. 

“The Assembly doth further require and appoint ministers and ruling elders to make diligent search and enquiry, in the congregations committed to their charge respectively, whether there be among them any family or families which use to neglect this necessary duty; and if any such family be found, the head of the family is to be first adminished privately to amend his fault; and, in case of his continuing therein, he is to be gravely and sadly reproved by the session; after which reproof, if he be found still to neglect Family-worship, let him be, for his obstinacy in such an offence, suspended and debarred from the Lord’s supper, as being justly esteemed unworthy to communicate therein, till he amend” (The Directory for Family Worship: Introduction).

Many Reformed Church Elders want strong members in their faith. Solid in Apostolic Doctrine, and with a heart on fire for the Gospel of Christ. However, so few of them are willing to shepherd their flock in this way, exhorting the heads of the family to do their duty as parents. Those who do not should be disciplined, if necessary, for spiritual negligence, which as a consequence would produce a lukewarm and indifferent church before Christ and His Law if left unchecked. 

Oliver Heywood, describing these houses that do not praise God, says the following: 

“Do you not often read your sin in the punishment of it? When you are Atheists in not worshiping God, your Children are Atheists in denying God. You are defective in duty and they abound in iniquity. You pray not for them so God rejects them and leaves them to notorious villainies, subjecting them to judicial punishment. Alternatively, God strikes them with astonishing judgment, as he did Eli’s Sons. Such events will make your heartache and call your sins to remembrance” (Modern English revised adaptation from A Family Altar, Erected to The Honour of the Eternal God by Oliver Heywood, Chapter 5, Page 65).

He continues by saying: 

“By behaving inconsistently with your prayers and professions, you inadvertently tempt your children and servants to be atheists much like scandalous Ministers who speak well and live ill” (Modern English revised adaptation from A Family Altar, Erected to The Honour of the Eternal God by Oliver Heywood, Chapter 5, Page 72).

Oh, beloved brethren! What a great reproach we shall receive from our sons, having never taught them how to pray, read, and know God, while we prioritized fishing, hunting, and playing sports. What a great reproach from our grandchildren to leave them without parents who would have taught them the Scriptures, and given them the knowledge of the True Religion.

I believe that the current prevalence of sectarianism among men and women today can be attributed to the failure of previous generations to cultivate a culture of worshiping God within their homes. How sad it is to be able to protect our nation from any invasion while being unable to protect our homes and future generations from false religion.

“I have failed to obey the voice of my teachers nor inclined my ears to them that instructed me! Now, I am left to mourn without hope, to die without instruction, without any to pray for me” (Modern English revised adaptation from A Family Altar, Erected to The Honour of the Eternal God by Oliver Heywood, Chapter 5, Page 76).

May God wake this generation of the one to come!

For further reading